(Borrowed from a forum)
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it,
I just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in
the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to
take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We
went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because
she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play
tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled "WHAT?"
I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy
your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she
was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and
not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either
women...

hehe
September 30 2005, 01:03:28 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 01:10:43 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 01:19:28 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 01:29:37 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 02:05:42 UTC 6 years ago
...too bad i cant do better
September 30 2005, 01:53:49 UTC 6 years ago
that you get
i dont know where
you get them
but they're still hilarious
September 30 2005, 02:09:59 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 02:19:18 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 02:54:17 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 02:57:52 UTC 6 years ago
oh and here's something eddie and i came up with while we were bored on msn:
[From Advent Children]
Kadaj: I'll show you my reunion!
Cloud: Dude, I didn't go to your highschool..
[Some things that Cloud wouldn't say out loud]
*Falling 500 feet from the air after killing Bahemut*
*Lands on I-beam*
*THUUUDD*
*in Clouds head*: oowww, that fucking hurt! but I gotta impress the girls! ^_^
Swords: $150,000.
Bike: $200,000.
Gas: $60.
Girls thinking im hardcore: Priceless.
LOL. we were SOO bored hahhahaha
September 30 2005, 03:02:35 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 03:03:11 UTC 6 years ago
October 1 2005, 00:58:03 UTC 6 years ago
October 1 2005, 01:01:00 UTC 6 years ago
October 1 2005, 01:53:28 UTC 6 years ago
btw i got ur copy already burnt
October 1 2005, 01:55:35 UTC 6 years ago
October 1 2005, 01:58:40 UTC 6 years ago
October 1 2005, 02:16:27 UTC 6 years ago
September 30 2005, 03:19:45 UTC 6 years ago
add me? thanks.
(by the way, it's jordan)
October 1 2005, 20:24:41 UTC 6 years ago
October 4 2005, 01:50:42 UTC 6 years ago
add me =)
October 4 2005, 01:56:25 UTC 6 years ago